Communication Strategies to Increase Influence and Impact [Back to Basics Part 2]

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Speaker 1: Welcome to the Quick Take podcast, the show where you

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get targeted advice and coaching for executives by

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executives.

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I'm Suzy Tomlinchuck.

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Speaker 2: And I'm James Capps.

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Give us 15 minutes and we'll give you three secrets to

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address the complex topic of issues that are challenging

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executives like you today.

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Speaker 1: Hey, welcome to Quick Take.

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I'm your host.

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One of your hosts, suzy Tomlinchuck, along with James

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Capps.

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How are you, james?

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Speaker 2: Hey, Suzy, I'm excellent today.

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Glad to be here.

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Speaker 1: I am so glad you're here, because I couldn't do this

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without you.

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Speaker 2: You probably could.

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It would just be really, you know, one-sided.

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Speaker 1: It would be one-sided .

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Just be my opinion.

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Speaker 2: That's right.

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Speaker 1: All right, so I'm going to get stuck there if I

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stay there.

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So let's just move on.

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Speaker 2: Let's move on.

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Speaker 1: Let's fire it up.

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Our best material comes from just conversations I have with

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executives all day long, and I happen to have one today,

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because every day is another conversation we were talking

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about.

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This leader was telling me that she has somebody on her team

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who talks too much and she said and even in our one-on-ones I

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kind of get lost in this point and I'm not really sure what to

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do with it.

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But what was really interesting is she goes.

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But I have the opposite problem with him sometimes in meetings

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where I want him to step up and contribute but he, like even

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after a pregnant pause, doesn't assert himself.

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I have to actually call on him and it's not just like team

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calls, it's like client calls, just a lot of different ones,

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and so we talked about communication strategies and I

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think, from an executive perspective, I wonder if we have

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some techniques that we can, maybe three of them that we

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could offer.

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Speaker 2: Well, you know, I think this is a really good

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topic for our back to basic series, which is, you know that,

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going back to the some of the foundational things that we talk

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about as leaders, that and so often we get caught up in our

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budget process, our audit process, whatever, and we forget

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the basics.

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And so I think, as you know, we have a series of four episodes

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we're putting together to talk about going back to basics, and

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I think this, you know, just communication strategies, if

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there is a intro level 101, you know, a pre-course that a lot of

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us should just really think about is good communication

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strategies.

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So I'd love talking about it.

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Speaker 1: Awesome, that sounds great, brilliant, to put it in

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the back, back to basics, because, like we had talked

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about before, it's really important to relook at with

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fresh eyes some of the things that we're doing, because we get

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bad habits.

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So it's such a great one.

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Yeah, so tell us what's the first one that's on your list.

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Speaker 2: Well, one of the things that you and I have

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talked about which is really interesting, is when you're in a

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room in particular, trying to fill the space in a similar

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volume or a similar amount that other people in the room are

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filling, and by amount I mean, you know, if somebody's talking,

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look at how much time people are talking and then you should

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talk in a similar amount, and so , and if they're talking a lot,

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you can feel free to talk a lot, but if they're and if you're

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not talking at all, you may have to step it up, or if you're

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talking too much, you may have to step it down.

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And so read the room, if you will contribute as much as

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others are and use that as a good way to measure how much

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speaking you should be providing .

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Speaker 1: I love that because it does give you something

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objective that you can look at to kind of know if you're

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putting your place in there.

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And I had an executive say to me last week can you help my

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people understand?

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It's not just showing up, it's being seen and that's another

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way of being seen at the table and making that space for

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yourself.

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It really is like your space at the table.

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Think about having equal space.

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Speaker 2: Right, and I think the next item I'd like to bring

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up as a number two is is okay.

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So you're now saying, looking at the room and you're you're

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thinking, hey, everybody should be speaking a similar amount and

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I, hey, perhaps have not been speaking as much, don't speak to

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, just to speak.

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Right, you want to contribute, you don't want to respond, and I

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think so often people in meetings will only provide

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information when asked.

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That's a call and response methodology, and your response

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may or may not be as powerful as some of the thoughts you have,

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and so I think it's important for you to try to focus on

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contributing and adding value to the meeting, not waiting for

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you to be called on.

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Speaker 1: Yes, and I'm going to go back to one little nuance

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you said in there so quickly is that if you're called on, your

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opinion or your thought is not as impactful as if you just lay

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it in there at the right time and say it on your own, so

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you're seen more.

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Speaker 2: Yep.

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I think that's the difference between responding and

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contributing.

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And I think you want to be a contributor, you just don't want

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to be responding, and I think that's it's a difference.

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And it's the difference between a participant and a leader.

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Yes, and you need to be a leader in the room.

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Speaker 1: Ooh, that's a good point.

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All right, that was good.

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That was like a rewindable moment right there.

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Speaker 2: Good one, james, that's a good piece.

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Speaker 1: Yeah Thanks, all right, what's number three?

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But I have a third piece.

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I have a third one.

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Speaker 2: Okay, good, my third one is one of my favorites, and

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so often now I work with a lot of technical people and a lot of

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us.

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When we get into a room, technology folks are really the

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worst.

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We get excited and we want to add value, and I often find

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people talk a ton that they are just that's almost word vomit.

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Sometimes they're just spewing everything they get out and a

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lot of times it's our response to A the fact that we have the

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floor.

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So we want to get our ideas out there and I want to make sure

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everybody hears me.

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But it's also just trying to add everything on the table at once

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, and my recommendation oftentimes is to try to speak

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like you write, and I think that now I'm not saying that you

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need to write in fully functioning and grammatically

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correct sentences, but you should think about where the

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punctuation goes.

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You should think about when you write an email and you have an

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introduction and you have supporting details and a closing

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, that if you speak in that manner, you will be able to get

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your ideas across in a much more cohesive way.

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People will hear you in a more.

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They hear it in a more familiar manner.

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It's going to resonate, and so our job as communicators is to

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not speak, it's to influence and inform, and if you're in a room

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and you're just simply filling the void, you're talking to be

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talking.

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But if you're there to inform or influence, you want to do it

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in a manner that can be digested and is very easily accessible

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by your audience, and speaking like you write is a really great

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way of doing that.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, you know, what's interesting is, I think

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that's a great mindset to have, because it gives you a structure

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to kind of get that ready.

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And then you say it, and then what you do is you're creating

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this habit that people are used to, and then they understand you

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even more deeply because they understand your cadence and the

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way that you speak, and so I think that's underrated.

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And you hear so many times that people say I was in this

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meeting and I had this great idea and then somebody stole it

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from me later.

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And the research says that that person isn't always

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intentionally doing that, but they're not packed, they didn't

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package it the right way the first time, and that person took

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the opportunity to kind of clarify and that that, if that's

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happening to you, that's means that's a signal that you're not

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packaging it well for people to understand.

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Speaker 2: You know that happens .

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It happens to me when I say something and then somebody a

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few minutes later says it again and it has more resonance.

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That's a signal to me that I did not say it well or I'm not

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being heard or I didn't set it up well, and that's not me

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getting frustrated with the audience.

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That's me getting frustrated with me.

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I failed, in my role as a communicator, to make that point

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in the way that I thought I did .

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And yeah, I think a lot of times it is.

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You get caught up in the moment .

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You get the points you want to make, you get the floor for a

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moment and you do.

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You know you're not as communicating as well as you

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could be.

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So thinking and speaking like you write, I think, is a great

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way of putting some structure around the way you speak.

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Speaker 1: Oh, that's so good.

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That's so good and it's so helpful to have these and really

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think about how you're using them.

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So what are the three again?

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Speaker 2: You know, the first one I think about a lot is

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really, you know, understand the space that others are occupying

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when they speak in a room and fill the similar amount of space

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.

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So don't talk more than others, but don't talk less than others

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.

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And the second one is try your role is to communicate, not to

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speak.

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So you want to add value in a meeting, so be sure that you are

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adding, you're not just responding, you're interjecting,

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you're adding value at the appropriate times.

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And then the third one is you know, try to speak like you

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write.

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Sometimes I coach people to verbalize the word comma and the

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word period, because it does force them to understand that

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that sentence probably should have ended right there.

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But speak like you write and you'll tend to be more crisp in

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your communication.

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Speaker 1: Oh, I love these.

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I am going to actually use these and really be thoughtful

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about the way I communicate in any facilitation I do, because I

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think this can be really helpful.

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Speaker 2: Well, that's why these are part of the Back to

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Basics series.

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Nice, everybody's going back to basics.

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That's the whole point.

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Speaker 1: And look, it's like back to school, Like look how we

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did that we didn't even make that connection.

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Speaker 2: Awesome, back to school.

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Speaker 1: You're seeing that in real time.

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I did not.

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Speaker 2: But I appreciate you bringing that home for our

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audience members who have that on their radar screen so cool.

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Speaker 1: I bring in the elementary.

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There you go.

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Speaker 2: Not touching that.

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Speaker 1: So, with that, we're glad you joined us today and we

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would love to hear from you.

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James and I are both on LinkedIn, so feel free to DM us,

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comment, just join the conversation and tell us what's

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on your mind.

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That's so helpful to us and so rewarding to us.

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We love that so much, absolutely.

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We are going to have two more of these Back to Basics, and if

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you missed the first one, make sure that you look for it,

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because we may not have teed it up very well, so it's not your

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fault, it's ours, so go back, and that was the one right

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before this one dropped.

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But thanks, james, I appreciate you.

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Speaker 2: I appreciate you, Sissie.

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Speaker 1: And we appreciate you .

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Thanks for listening.

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Thank you so much for being here.

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Thanks for listening to this week's episode of Quick Take,

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where we talk about the questions that are on the minds

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of executives everywhere.

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Connect with us and share what's on your mind.

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Speaker 2: You can find us on LinkedIn, youtube or whatever

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nerdy place on the internet.

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You find your podcasts and the things you really did are in the

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show notes.