Leadership Lessons from Stand-up Comedian Stephanie McHugh - Part Two

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Speaker 1: Welcome to the Quick Take podcast, the show where you

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get targeted advice and coaching for executives by

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executives.

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I'm Suzy Tomonczuk.

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Speaker 2: And I'm James Capps.

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Give us 15 minutes and we'll give you three secrets to

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address the complex topic of issues that are challenging

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executives like you today.

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Speaker 1: Hey, welcome to Quick Take.

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I'm your host, Suzy Tomonczuk, along with my co-host, James

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Capps, and we're already laughing which is a good sign.

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Speaker 2: Oh, it's such a good sign and it's a good indicator

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that, yes, today we've got our special guest come back, brought

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back Stephanie McHugh, who was a lot of fun last time.

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So welcome back, Steph.

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Speaker 3: Thank you.

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Thank you, james Hi Suzy.

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Speaker 1: Hi, it's so good to see you.

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I know James was talking about how there's such a parallel

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between I'm not going to put words in your mouth, James, so

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take it but between me and you.

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Speaker 2: So you did, yeah, I think that it's so interesting

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that you know the work that you do.

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Suzy is a coach and working with large teams at offices and

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events, and then, steph, you get brought in by executive groups

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for off-sites, for team building , for goal settings, and I think

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that you both have really great , obviously, professional

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experiences, but also great insights, and so both of you

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leverage those in the corporate environment, and so it's just

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great to have you back, steph, to give us some more of the

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insights from the stage.

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Speaker 3: Thank you.

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Yeah, it is kind of one of my favorite things to do, and a lot

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of times people think, oh, I'm going to have a comedian, but I

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don't want an hour long, you don't want to have times an hour

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to devote to that.

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A lot of times there's a woman's entrepreneur group, the

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Dames, and they have different chapters all along the front

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range and all over the country actually, and I'll just Laughter

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is one of their core values.

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Oh yeah, I love that, and so I will come in and do 10 minutes

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right up front just to kind of bring the energy up, get that

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laughter in and that focus, and then they go on and do the rest

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of their meeting.

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So that's another thing that I think is fun and kind of cater

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it to that group.

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And then, yeah, sure, it brings people together.

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Speaker 2: I love that.

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That's kind of what the icebreaker is ultimately, but

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what a different way of doing it .

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I mean, I can hear the cringing of our audience when I say the

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words icebreaker, but to do what an icebreaker does in a very

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different way is always great.

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So thank you for joining us again and giving us some insight

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.

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So we have our patent pending three pieces of advice that we'd

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like to dish out to our quickster.

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So what's your first piece of advice?

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Yeah, the first thing that I have as I'm looking nonchalantly

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at my notes is it was so nonchalantly your chalance is

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very nonchalant, I mean, when you told us that kind of did to

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Goy, bish and Malan.

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Speaker 3: How do you find things for that group?

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Speaker 1: Oh yeah.

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Speaker 3: For example, what I just brought up.

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I've got 10 minutes, and so I will often interview the person

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who hired me or some people in that organization just to find

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out.

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And I'm not looking for funny things, I'm looking for what's a

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common.

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Yeah, context, pain or problem that you have or something like

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that.

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For example, I was doing during the pandemic.

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They had one chapter in Scottsdale and so I talked to

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them and I said so what are some traits or what?

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And they go well, a lot of in Arizona, scottsdale is

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considered snobby.

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We're kind of the real and I'm like you don't want to pun, you

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can't make fun of them per se.

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So I kind of spent a day and like how can I sort of make fun

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of that?

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So I just said that they were really bad at it.

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Like I just met with them there for nice.

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So I don't think you got the memo that you're supposed to be

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a little snobby, it's not.

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Speaker 2: Well, it's what they said Well done, well done

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Actually.

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Speaker 3: So you just find something and a twist on it, a

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misdirector or what.

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So that's an example and it keeps it kind of fun for me.

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I have the jokes that I've done before that I know are going to

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work, but it's kind of fun to go.

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All right, we got this one time that this is going to be

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relatable, and do that Okay.

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Speaker 1: I really like that, because when you think about the

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interests of the team before you walk in and what's going to

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really land with them, that shows that connection and that

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dedication to understanding that you're not just bringing a

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presentation, you're not just bringing a message, you're not

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just trying to tell them.

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This is how I need you to think differently.

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You're meeting them where they are.

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You're kind of showing them that you did your homework and

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you're invested in this meeting.

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What do you think, James?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I think you're right, as a leader, though, to

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take that into.

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What am I going to do with that every day?

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It's always about having that connection and understanding the

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common thread between your teams.

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I think when you go into a meeting, it's great to make sure

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that everyone's aligned and find a way to create that

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commonality.

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Sometimes you do get everybody in a room and you give them an

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update of what this is the thing we're going to talk about, so

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we're all on the same page.

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You can talk about.

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Boy, we had a rough quarter, everybody knows but it's about

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creating that cohesion in a group that really allows them to

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be better.

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I think what you're doing there stuff is really finding a

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common rallying, creating a unifying message for everybody.

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I think that just is a great way to build a team.

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Speaker 1: I love.

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It All right, what's your?

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Speaker 3: second one.

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Okay, the second one is how do you get people back?

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Let's say they're not interested and whatnot.

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Speaker 1: Oh yeah, oh, that must be hard when people aren't

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laughing.

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It is yeah.

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Speaker 3: I hate it, but also I'm kind of used to it a little,

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not used to it.

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I'm not used to it because I'm not happy.

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Well, yeah, I mean I'm used to it, I mean it's just every day,

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but I feel, go ahead, it doesn't throw me it's like you would

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think it is, and a lot of times when you audition, you audition

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for the Friday night late show because, that is the hardest

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audience and you will do the first show on a Friday.

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Everybody's going out on a date.

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It's the beginning of the weekend, Everybody's excited and

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you get off and you're like I am so funny, you know it was the

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beginning of the heart.

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This is just fine.

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And then same night, same venue .

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Now it's.

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The show starts at 10 or 10 30.

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Now everyone's worked all day, they've gone to happy hour,

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they've had a couple drinks and they're tired.

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So the energy is just different .

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So I think just meet them where they're at, be okay with it.

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Don't take it personally.

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It's your so just go with it.

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Don't try to make them the early show Friday.

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Be with them there, be yourself and be with them there, or make

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them stand up.

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Sometimes I think about that in the meeting.

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You know like hey, let's just you know, stand up and yell

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something at the person next to you, or whatever.

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Speaker 2: No, but I think that it's so great as a leader that

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you you have to meet people where they are Right.

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Yeah, and sometimes you'll go into a meeting.

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I've gotten into my staff meeting thinking we're going to

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have a really detailed discussion around some sort of

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meaty topic and I could just tell they're not there, they're

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not ready for that.

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We weren't prepped.

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The energy isn't there, we don't have the right person and

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as a leader, you have to be.

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You know, you have to be very present with your staff.

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You have to be very present and aware of what's going on with

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your people.

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And sure, you can plow through and, like you know, in your

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situation you can plow through and do your set no matter what's

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going on in the audience.

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But that's just not going to be effective.

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And as a leader you've got to, you could just plow through and

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do whatever you think is going to be right, but that's just not

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going to be as effective.

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And I think being connected to your team, being connected to

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your audience, is huge.

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Speaker 1: You know, this is really hits home for me too as a

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coach, and when people are paying me, I feel like I have to

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bring all the content.

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And I've had this recent shift that I really need to be in the

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moment and be in the room and it's about them and how they're

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shifting, and so that mindset shift for me has been kind of

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empowering to be like it's not about me at all, it's about what

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am I doing for the people in the room.

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Speaker 2: Susie, do you find sometimes that you're asked to

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do something and you get there and it's, and that's not what

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you're there for?

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Yes, yeah.

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And, Steph, do you sometimes go in thinking that this is going

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to be the thing that hits?

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And that's not the thing that hits at all.

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It's something else that your, your, your, your B set, your B

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material is the is the home run.

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Speaker 3: Yes.

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Speaker 2: That's really interesting that there's a

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similarity there.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, absolutely, and sometimes this happened.

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Recently I was brought in for a fundraiser and they said what

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the goal was, but it was actually different.

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Yeah.

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So you kind of have to adjust a little bit, right yeah.

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Speaker 1: And sometimes I'm sorry, james, but sometimes I go

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in and I I intentionally reiterate the goal so that

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everybody on the room understands that that's our goal

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, so that they know we've hit it at the end, cause if I don't do

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that, then I don't know, or they don't know what we're going

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toward.

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Speaker 2: I don't know that.

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That would be great as a hello.

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Speaker 1: Steph Good meeting.

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Speaker 2: I'm your comedian for tonight.

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The goal will be laughter.

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Now let's take, let's, let's go on to the first practice yeah

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let's try it.

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Okay, excellent point, let's go through.

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Can we recap my first three jokes?

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Speaker 1: No, but I do have an idea for you, Steph, If you go

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to the 10 o'clock version, you say, hey, listen, I'm going to

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do the whole the same set I did for them and they laughed

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hysterically.

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So it's really up to you.

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It's up to you on how you react .

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Speaker 2: Cause I'm hilarious, right, yeah, I mean you may not

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get paid for that, but it's funny, let's be on the get far,

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all right.

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Speaker 3: What's your third one there?

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Speaker 1: Um, I can't remember what it is.

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Speaker 2: I.

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Speaker 3: I thought I would do before you go in, not that I

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know you do before you go in to get yourself hyped up.

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Speaker 1: That was totally being in the moment.

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Speaker 3: Just a little side note for everyone when I'm

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getting ready, putting on my face and doing my hair, I will

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listen to another comedian just to kind of get the rhythm or

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whatever, and sometimes I'll listen to my own set a little

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bit just to get the, to make sure.

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Speaker 2: I've got the joke.

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Speaker 3: You know, I remember him specifically if it's been a

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while since I've done those, and then I just tend to be a little

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bit more excited about the, the the, the the the most, and then

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I just tend to be more laid back.

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That's my I don't.

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I'm not trying to change myself , but I'm just trying to bring

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the energy up a little bit more.

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So sometimes listening to another comedian just sort of

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helps me get the the rhythm.

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I'm not trying to be them, I'm just sort of enjoying listening

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to them.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, you know, it's the same for me.

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I learned that if I'm speaking and I'm, I'm, I'm speaking after

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another really great speaker.

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I love following somebody.

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Speaker 2: It's really great, like me, like yeah.

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Speaker 1: If I follow James.

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I know I'm going to do.

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Well, it's, it's amazing, yeah, but you have to watch the video

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if you want to know what happened there.

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But if somebody that has it, has a lot of confidence, just

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brings my confidence up, and so it's kind of the same thing that

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you are saying is what, what is your, your warm-up music?

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What is the thing that's going to make you at your best to do

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right before you walk in?

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Speaker 3: Right, Sometimes I'll listen to a a Haka too.

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Speaker 2: Oh, yeah, yeah, I can see that.

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Speaker 3: Have you heard of that?

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Yeah, it's a.

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There's a wedding one that they did at a wedding.

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So basically I just feel like that's like that's playing full

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out but you know the energy that they bring.

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It's so beautiful and, um, yeah , I just think it's the most

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beautiful thing and to to watch them.

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Speaker 2: Really what that is is you have to bring your own

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energy.

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It's BYOE.

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I think that as a leader boy, there's nothing worse than when

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I can see somebody comes into a room or an executive and they

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are not there.

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They're not present.

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Their energy is down.

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It affects the room like nothing else.

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I find that my job half the time is to bring people to.

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I have to be a cheerleader, I have to be positive, I have to

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be the spin guy, because if you don't bring that energy, nobody

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does.

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I think both of you in your roles see that and you find ways

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to get yourself there.

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As a leader, there are absolute moments where I'm walking into

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a room and I have to go.

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All right, I just got my ass kicked in that last meeting and

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I got to just move on.

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And because this next one has nothing to do with that, but I

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can't afford this one to be affected by that one.

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So, it's one challenge.

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Speaker 3: That's a great point, James.

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I wish I could say it's always going to work every time, but

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sometimes things just don't work out, and so that's part of the

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process, and then you just move on.

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Speaker 2: I love that.

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I mean even as a leader, I think sometimes I go into a room

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and I'll just have no choice but to say hey guys, I'm not

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here, I just got my ass kicked, or whatever.

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Speaker 1: Do you, do you say that?

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I absolutely do.

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I love that.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, there are times when it's just the alternative

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is look, it's like it's not being authentic If you're set,

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if you're not, you know, if you're not present, you're not

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doing a good set, it's just not.

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It's not a good set and you can , you're.

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You're getting paid to do it, steph, and it's a very different

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scenario.

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But you know, I get points.

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I get paid, if you will, for authenticity as well, and maybe

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that meeting isn't great, but I'm still getting paid.

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If you, I'm getting a connection to my team, my

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rapport, that there's the benefits I still get out of it

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If I'm just transparent and say, guys, we're going to have to

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reschedule because this isn't working right now, for whatever

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reason, and I think that's just my style.

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So energy is a real thing.

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So I'll stop my rant there and I'll wrap it up there.

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Speaker 1: OK, bring me home.

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Speaker 2: You go.

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I don't know if I could do it.

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You know, steph, you had some really three really good pieces

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of advice.

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Can you, can you wrap those up for us?

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Speaker 3: Yes, I can.

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How do you find things to talk about that specific to that

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group?

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Speaker 2: Know your team, know your people Love it.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, Uh-huh, Find you know possibly a common pain

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or something that they haven't come in.

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What do you do to get people to focus right, To get people

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focused on what you're talking about?

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Speaker 2: And make sure you're all on the same page.

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Be present with your team.

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Speaker 1: Have everyone together Love it Yep.

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Right yeah.

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Speaker 3: And then the third one is for my getting ready is

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all I will, as I'm putting on my makeup and my doing my hair,

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I'll listen to another comedian and then I'll listen to Haka

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which is a.

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Speaker 2: B yeah, yeah, bring your own energy.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, love it, love it, love it.

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Speaker 2: But three really great pieces of advice that

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really are applicable to, to, to , to certainly your space, the

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coaching space and the leadership space.

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So yeah, thanks, so much, yeah, it was.

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Speaker 1: yeah, it was really interesting to look at those

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different parallels.

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What a great idea, james.

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As always so great.

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Thank you, it was a lot of fun.

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We hope you found this valuable as well.

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We certainly had fun doing it and we were definitely in the

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moment.

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I'll just say that, so feel free to share this with somebody

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.

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Connect with James or I on LinkedIn.

00:16:33
Steph, how can people find you?

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Speaker 3: They can send me an email at Stephanie, at Stephanie

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McHughcom.

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That's a lot of letters.

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Speaker 2: You can also on.

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Speaker 3: Instagram at Steph S T E P H comedy.

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Steph comedy, that's comedy.

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That's easy.

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Send me a message or follow me there, that's, and she's so fun

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to watch.

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Speaker 1: So it's just fun to have her in my feed every day.

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So definitely connect with Steph, especially if you have

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something coming up and even in, like she said, it's just fun to

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have her in my feed every day.

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So instead it's just a small segment.

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I mean, james, you would definitely leverage that Right.

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Speaker 2: No, it's a great, great way of creating not only

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an interesting energy around the event, but also just something

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different, and I think that's what a lot of people need for

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those types of things.

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Speaker 3: So lovely, love the idea, great idea, so it goes.

00:17:22
Is another great way to start a meeting as an icebreaker.

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Speaker 2: Okay, there's a freebie.

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Speaker 1: There you go, Steph don't give away your don't give

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away your secret there.

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All right, that's another episode, so we'll come back to

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that and break that down.

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So thanks for joining us.

00:17:38
We appreciate you.

00:17:40
["we Appreciate You"].

00:17:42
Thanks for listening to this week's episode of Quick Take,

00:17:45
where we talk about the questions that are on the minds

00:17:47
of executives everywhere.

00:17:49
Connect with us and share what's on your mind.

00:17:52
Speaker 2: You can find us on LinkedIn, youtube or whatever

00:17:54
nerdy place on the internet.

00:17:56
You find your podcasts.

00:17:57
All the links you really need are in the show notes ["We

00:18:01
Appreciate You"].